I recently read that in Denmark taxes are levied as much as fifty percent sometimes. I cannot imagine Americans tolerating something like that and I think this is sad. The reason that Denmark taxes its members so heavily is to provide guaranteed government funding for all its members. The members get time off for childbirth, regulated work hours, etc. I don’t think Americans would tolerate what they would perceive as government interference in their lives. But I don’t view it that way. I believe in a society that believes in all its members. I have always been an idealist, and probably a bit of a socialist at heart. I simply don’t understand, at a gut level, why we live in one of the richest countries in the world and have 47 million people uninsured. Or why we have tax breaks for the rich while good portions of our population are policed away from public areas for the “crime” of being homeless. I think these disparities between what we profess to believe and the way we actually live make ours a poor, not a great nation.
Instead of increasing the distance between our well-off citizens and those who are not making it, why can’t we craft government policies that benefit all? I don’t know how to do it. But I do believe, feverently, in the right of all citizens to have equal access to good health care, family benefits that allow families time off after giving birth, day care centers that allow women to work and a liberal arts education for all children that everyone can afford, regardless of race or socioeconomic status. Imagine what our country would be like if we had in place, preventive programs that provided support for every member of our society. Would things be perfect? Of course not. Humans are not that predictable or easily pidgeonholed. But it would be a great way to show what our values are as a country. Do we value material things more, or people? I think that if we were to begin treating all our country’s members as valuable, we would be on the right path to being a truly great nation.
12 comments:
The overall idea is good. There needs to be separate paragraphs for different themes. This will help a reader focus better. I think a catching couple firt sentences should be included. I like your belief and think that most of American's want that but on other hand want not too much government involvement.
You're right, you are an idealist. All of the things that you proposed would be great if we lived in an idealistic society or one that believed in socialism but we live in an individualistic society so I don't think the American people, those in power or those with the most money), would ever want to see these changes being made. It's always good to see that people still think like you do, however. Like Victoriya said, I would just recommend breaking down your essay into more paragraphs instead of just having one big paragraph for people to read. I'm also not sure how long your essay is already but, if you have words left to use, maybe you could include why you're such an idealist and if you've done anything in your own personal life to act upon this idealism.
Barbara,
You're off to really good start with this piece. Despite what others have said, I imagine that you had this all arranged into paragraphs and the blog's formatting broke down on you. I would like to see a bigger focus on the aspect you address at the end - treating all of our country's members (citizens) as equals. It is an interesting idea. To highlight some of you points, you should use some qualitative data, i.e., when talking about tax cuts for the rich, explain exactly what they are, there effect, etc.
I agree with you have. I think if we were taxed more people would be mad, but the benefit of it would be for the greater good. It's ironic that America is a developed country, but even Canada has free health care for its citizens.
I really liked your essay. And you are 100% correct its very idealistic, but I don't think there is a problem with being an idealist. Whats wrong with wanting a better world? I believe you should break up the essay a little better though, with paragraphs for each idea, and maybe not be a socialist at heart, just kidding, the paper is great overall.
I heard in my political science class that we are only taxed 22 cents from every dollar which is the lowest in the world. I would certainly be willing to pay more taxes to solve that many problems that plague our nation. Lack of health insurance hurts everyone in the long run. I don't think there's anything wrong with being a socialist at heart because some of their values would be great for our nation.
To improve, I think you should separate your thoughts out in more paragraphs to make it easier to read.
I completely agree with you! I can't understand why US citizens can't be gauranteed something as necessary as health care. One thing to fix is to maybe break it up into paragraphs. I don't know if blogger is pushing everything together, but paragraphs are always great for the flow of the essay!
You make very good points and ask very good questions. Using Denmark as an example was also very effective for your point. I really liked your essay. I would just like to see you work on organization and using paragraphs like others pointed out. Good job!
Your essay focuses on an issue that I really think should be brought up more often. It's absolutely ridiculous that so many people in the U.S. live in poverty when our nation is one of the richest on the planet. Although Blogger's formatting probably did this, separating your ideas into paragraphs would make it a little easier to read.
The theme of your essay and how it was written was strong. It got the point across.
Maybe you could offer something more personal(a story? situation? etc) to drive the point home. I think you have room to add more ... I think, or factual data to draw a picture for readers.
I completely agree with your statement about Americans not tolerating other countries economic policies. Like what others had said, maybe work to cut down the writings into smaller paragraphs to help readers focus.
Barbara, as a bit of a socialist myself, it is not difficult to see and understand your argument. 47 million uninsured... wow!!! You mentioned many hypocrisies that have saturated the culture of this 'great' nation.
However, where does this belief stem from? Was there an event in your personal experience where this philosophy was solidified? Your well-versed essay was only hard to follow because it came across in one large paragraph. Breaking it up will make your excellent points easier to stand out.
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